It’s a common experience for pregnant people to receive well-meaning, but not scientifically-based suggestions from friends and family about how to eat and sleep and medicate while expecting.
Dr. Ella Speichinger, an OBGYN with MU Healthcare, said she has seen the stress of trying to keep up with outside influence take a toll on new moms.
“Pregnancy is one of the most socially regulated things,” Speichinger said. “People will come up to you and tell you you can’t lay on your back after 7 weeks; there is no evidence for that.”
Now, there are new sources of information for pregnant people to wade through: complete strangers on the internet. This added layer further complicates the narrative of what pregnant people should be doing.
Speichinger advised caution when listening to advice on what not to do during pregnancy because there’s usually a lack of evidence behind the claims and those on social media do not have to prove their medical qualifications.
Additionally, information shared by the US Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy Jr. has reupped the concern about the use of Tylenol during pregnancy. In September, he claimed this was a cause of autism.
While there is no evidence for this claim, Dr. Speichinger said it caused alarm for new and expectant parents.
“The Tylenol conversation, like when that came out, was an all day every day conversation … you kind of know what you're going to say,” Speichinger said. “It still takes probably 10 minutes, that is the visit. So there's no other education that's happening in that period.”
Speichinger stressed that patients should feel comfortable talking to their physician about any questions that may arise. She said not every pregnancy will be the same and individual needs should be taken into account.
“I think a natural curiosity of like, a patient brings something in and says, ‘I’ve heard this. What do you think about that? How does that make you feel?’ And spending time trying to undo a little bit of that information,” Speichinger said.
Seeking out trusted sources of information
Dr. Courtney Barnes, another OBGYN at MU Health Care, said that pregnancy and labor advice can come from numerous trusted sources of information, such as primary care physicians, OBGYNS, doulas and more.
The goal, she said, for all of these professionals is the same — supporting the expectant parent.
Barnes said she experienced this firsthand during her own labor, when she had to rely on those around her for support and care.
“I'm in labor, and I'm trying to assess my own labor and you cannot do it, you know? And I'm an obstetrician,” Barnes said. “At some point I had to look to my provider and say, ‘What am I supposed to do here?’”
Since it is not always possible for a patient’s primary obstetrician to be a part of the labor experience, she added that having a network of support people who are familiar with the patient and their birth plan can help the person feel safer in their experience.
She suggested talking with the birthing person — before the labor — about what they want to get out of the experience and how they would like to handle difficult situations. This can take some of the pressure off the new parent in the moment.
Barnes said, overall, it’s important to take a gentler look at the journey of pregnancy and parenthood.
“I think people think ‘One wrong thing and my baby is gonna be ruined,’ and thank goodness that’s just not the way it is. There’s a huge margin for error,” Barnes said.
She further emphasized the importance of pregnant people being patient with themselves and giving themselves more grace.
“You don’t have to have a perfect diet to have a healthy pregnancy. You don't have to have perfect exercise to have a healthy pregnancy,” Barnes said. “There are lots of ways you can be a really fabulous mother and not one of them is perfect.”
