Nkenge Miller is a Black doula in St. Louis who started her own doula practice, Doula’s Intuition, in 2018. She spoke about the need for and benefit of doulas – especially those with shared cultural backgrounds.
Missouri Health Talks gathers Missourians’ stories of access to healthcare in their own words.
Nkenge Miller: In birth and family planning, everyone does things differently – but it should all be respected due to the fact that we are all taught differently, we learn differently, we birth differently.
So, in my experience, I have offered so many different ways and looks and styles of being a doula: I've been a doula for people who may not have a partner or a spouse, for people who have experienced loss.
I would automatically say the role that we play is very important because having a doula isn't something that is a luxury, it's something that we all need.
I feel like doulas can kind of fit into so many different, you know, areas – whether that’s during birth, postpartum, prenatally.
There are people who feel like they would never need a doula. I always tell those people that it's okay. You always want people to utilize your services that want your service, you don't want to force yourself on people, but it's not like hiring a secretary or an assistant or something – It's literally your health, your health care. You're having a person and you want to be educated and supported throughout that.
That's exactly what it is.
So, I try to ensure that they understand that this has happened to various amounts of birthing people, and that when these things happen and you don't have someone there to just give you exactly what's going on, you're like – you're panicking.
Some people just want to do less to get that further education, but “give it to m regular, no doctor talk. Some people hire us just for comfort.
And some people feel shaded when women of color say things like, “Oh, black, doulas should be…,” you know, but I just feel like whatever doula or support person fits into your family – that's who you should hire.
"Having a doula isn't something that is a luxury, it's something that we all need."
Because, again, this person is going to see you in your rarest, most vulnerable moments. They're going to see you from the rooter to the tooter, and you don't want that to be someone that you're not comfortable with and that your family may not be comfortable with.
It doesn't have anything to do with race and being negative. It's just that there's going to be certain things that I'm going to understand that other people may not understand.
So, you have to hire the person that you feel is gonna connect with you.
We need a doula rainbow for every type of person, you know, because you want everyone to have the same support. We need Black doulas, white doulas, Asian doulas, Hispanic doulas, we need Island doulas.
We need doulas from every different type of background so that everyone feels supported. No one's left out, and we can fix this problem as a whole.
