Dani Emma Devine and Cheryl Barbero are girlfriends in their mid-60s – both of whom came out later in life. Dani is a transgender lesbian and Cheryl is pansexual.
A few years ago, Cheryl says she nearly gave up on dating all together - but then she met Dani. They spoke about how a mix of love and laughter keeps them young.
Alphabet Soup shares LGBTQ+ Missourians’ stories through portraiture and personal narratives.
Cheryl Barbero: We're so goofy. That's what one of my kids said, “You guys are like teenagers.”
Dani Emma Devine: We laugh all the time. I think that's one of the signs of love – if you’re always laughing.
Cheryl Barbero: Either that or insanity, I don’t know.
Laughter
Dani Emma Devine: I’ll take both of them, it’s fine.
Laughter
– if they’re a package deal, yeah.
Cheryl Barbero: It was really strange. Here I am just trying to get out of a dating site, because I just don't want to mess with that anymore. And that is where I find my love.
"Just because I'd been alone for 30 years, didn't mean that I needed to be alone forever."Cheryl Barbero
Yeah, I'm pretty straightforward.
Laughter
Dani Emma Devine: Yes, you are.
Cheryl Barbero: We were gonna go on a date. This is one of our first few dates. I was just looking at her in the car thinking just how cute she was and everything.
And I just reached over and grabbed her boob. And then I thought, “Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I did not mean to do that.”
Dani Emma Devine: No need to apologize either.
Cheryl Barbero: She loved it.
Dani Emma Devine: Yeah.
Laughter
Cheryl Barbero: It really broke the ice. Okay well, maybe this will go somewhere.
Dani Emma Devine: Yes, it was affirming that somebody that I really liked a lot at that time – I didn't fall in love instantly, but pretty damn close. That was … touched me. It was just perfect.
Cheryl Barbero: I didn't get the handbook for being a lesbian, so I didn't know how to do it. And then I was divorced and by myself for a long time – 30 years, and I didn't think I'd ever find love again.
I've learned a lot in this whole situation. Definitely don't, you know, discount anything like, don't throw out not having a relationship the rest of your life. I mean, just because I'd been alone for 30 years, didn't mean that I needed to be alone forever.
Dani Emma Devine: Basically, for me, I just want to make sure that my life is – I'm living it the best I can. And I, unfortunately I don't really, I can't be responsible for being like a role model. For one thing, it's so late in my life that they have more life experience with regard to that than I do.
Cheryl Barbero: But the young people have given us a lot of encouragement and they’ve made us feel really good about who we are, and you know it just makes me feel good. And I go, you guys are so lucky that you found out so early.
Dani Emma Devine: I needed to find the right person and I finally did. We found each other and I am so grateful every day for that.
Cheryl Barbero: I love her exactly the way she is, and I think that just makes me the most happy – is to be around family and to be around friends and just have joy and laugh and have fun.
Dani Emma Devine: I’m so incredibly happy that it almost puts the definition back in being gay.
Laughter
